Not Losing Me

So in the midst of having ridiculous break downs this summer, I woke up and realized I did have a career I wanted to do. I want to be a manager for entertainers. I want to help them stay organized, keep their schedules, and give them someone to trust.

And while I now have this career path in mind I also have to remember I am a wife and a mother. As is brought up all the time, women in these roles are put in such a rough position. While I want to be myself and achieve my goals, I have to remember my responsibilities as a mother. I made the decision to become a mom and therefore I have been learning how to prioritize my life. 

It's not easy, part of me has those thoughts of wishing I could be selfish and focus soully on myself. I finally know what I want to do with my life! Why did this have to happen after my marriage and son? Well it did. So now I have to move on from that.

I have such an amazing husband and partner. I am blessed to be able to stay at home and raise my son while I go back to school. What a blessing! It definitely helps me make sure I focus on my son while still giving myself the education I need. 

I think it's important as parents that we make our children aware that we are humans too. We have goals and a life. We had these before kids and we will have them after they are grown and leave the house. I feel like showing my son this in giving him the sight of goal setting too. 

I just wish that raising my son and having a career didn't come with such time management. I guess it's helping me prepare for my job. But it still sucks when I feel like I'm being selfish for wanting to achieve some things for myself. 

Regardless, I'm learning and I feel like I'm finally getting the hang of it. At the end of the day as long as I do my absolutely best for my family I can sleep soundly at night.