Or more importantly, what is dating? I have been doing a lot of thinking about dating and relationships. Don't ask me why, I am in the world's most blessed relationship. I thank God every night before bed for Kurt and what the two of us have. However, I have been watching my best friend's grow, and with growth has come relationships.
The more I think about it, the more I think that courting is something that should be brought back. I cannot think of one relationship that has been "casual dating" for anyone I know that has ended on a positive note. Basically what I am trying to say is that dating, especially when you are young, is absolutely and completely pointless.
Think about it, courting is serious. You are learning and growing with a person who could possibly be your future spouse. It is meant for love and for marriage. It is not just mean for happiness. A lot of people go out with a significant other for their happiness, not because they are looking for someone to share their lives with.
Truly, you are not ready to be married until you are an adult. Even though I met my future spouse at the young age of 18, we waited 2 whole years before we became engages, and 4 years before we are getting married. It is not something to be taken lightly.
Sex is another issue. At one point in my life, I thought that sex wasn't that a big a deal. Now that I've thought more on the subject, I think that it's something special that should be between a husband and wife. Marriage is a representation of God's love in our life and it's sacred and that's what sex is. I don't know, everything that adults told me in my life as a teen just makes so much more sense now. It has finally clicked. It's something I really want to drive into my sister's head and make her realize as a young adult.
Aw, I think it's sweet you're already looking out for your lil sis when she's still so young. I'm looking out for mine as well, but I know she's got a good head on her shoulders & she isn't really into boys as much as I was at that age yet :P
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I agree with everything you've said here. My definition of "dating" pretty much is "courting".. I don't date casually, it's kind of a weird concept to me. I date to try to find a lifelong partner.
I feel as though we should have lunch together again sometime. We keep saying we should, but never have actually gotten to it except for that first time we did D: I do have a question for you though, something I've been wondering for a bit & think you'd be the best person out of our friends to ask:
When you've been with your significant other long enough, that feeling of excitement & newness kinda fades away.. how do you keep learning more about each other and growing together despite that?
Yes! I truly do want to have lunch with you! I will definitely text/message you to see if you are available before you leave! I'm sorry I took so long to reply to this. I always forget to check to see if I have messages or anything on here lol.
ReplyDeleteI know exactly what it feels like for that excitement to fade away. I know how heart wrenching and terrible that feeling is, how nervous it makes you feel. I could talk about those all feelings. The cure? Still not sure on that. When this feeling comes it is the true test to see just how compatible you are with your significant other. You truly begin to think, "is he the one?" "should I be in this relationship?" if the answers to those questions are 'yes', then you're on the right track! This still sometimes happens to me. Sometimes I find we can be so different that I wonder if it's too different. Then I learn to appreciate the little things in the relationship. When he puts forth the slightest effort to do things with me, or texts/calls me first without me having to prompt it; those are things that kept me going in that time of wonder.
The thing you have to do is pursue forward, keep positive, keep open communication. Make sure he knows everything you're feeling about this, make sure he tells you what he's feeling. When hanging out, make sure to try to have plans ready before you hang out. Know what movie you're going to watch, what restaurant you are going to. The biggest arguments will arise over not knowing what to do when together, so try to already have that figured out. If he's playing the lazy card, take charge and tell him what you two are doing or what you want to do most.
Also, make time for each others interests. If he really likes to do this but you never do it with him, try doing it and vice versa. And every once in awhile, do something big. Spend an entire day together at the mall/movies/dinner or plan a trip to Skyline Drive/ the zoo.
I know you're leaving soon and this really wont help you much, but I hope it's something to think about and hopefully you are already working all of this out =)
I am going to go get on fb and see if you are avaiable sometime this week before you leave!